God designed marriage to be joyful. I once believed the words of a newlywed friend, that, “things will just work themselves out.” After seven years of marriage and working with couples as a therapist, I’ve learned that relationships succeed because we work things out. Marriages are not self-sustaining and do not survive on autopilot. They require constant attention and intentional effort. But it can be rewarding effort. It can be an adventure! And like any adventure it is not easy. There are unexpected detours, obstacles, and challenges. But there are also thrills, excitement, and happiness. God designed marriage this way. God desires for us to experience this fullness of grace and life.
— from the book What I Wish Someone Had Told Me about the First Five Years of Marriage