God resists our evil and conquers it with good. Think about that. God shocks and stuns us into love. God does not love us if we change, God loves us so that we can change. Only love effects true inner transformation, not duress, guilt, shunning, or social pressure. Love is not love unless it is totally free. Grace is not grace unless it is totally free.
— from the book Breathing Under Water: Spirituality and the Twelve Steps by Richard Rohr